Girls aren't born hating their bodies

pHOTO CREDIT - Meg Gaiger/Harpyimages

pHOTO CREDIT - Meg Gaiger/Harpyimages

Powerful image no? And we've seen this before, noticed how the media sends the wrong image out and importantly how it creates an interesting divide between men and women. It is assumed this world is still run like 16th century Maharaj India with concubines aplenty, that what we suffer is lack of choice and lack of decision making power under the chains of the patriarch.

It isn't true. It is a place of the past. It doesn't honour the present moment and actually does a discredit to those that have done the work before us, as women, to pave the way, and that includes our mothers. We owe it to our forebears to take advantage of the many opportunities that we have to create our own destiny in this present day.

I looked up Germaine Greer via Wiki and saw this passage and thought it appropriate. [Greer is a liberation rather than equality feminist. Her goal is not equality with men, which she sees as assimilation and "agreeing to live the lives of unfree men." "Women's liberation," she wrote in The Whole Woman, "did not see the female's potential in terms of the male's actual." She argues instead that liberation is about asserting difference and "insisting on it as a condition of self-definition and self-determination." It is a struggle for the freedom of women to "define their own values, order their own priorities and decide their own fate.]

The last sentence especially rang true. Define your own values and decide your own fate. This is a true definition of being a feminist. And to put a very practical Ayurvedic spin on it, it is honouring your monthly cycles by slowing down when you menstruate, by learning to take time out to nourish yourself, thereby establishing Self as a priority, by doing the work and looking at not just who hurt you in the past but also WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE. I wonder on the statistics of women tending to trauma vs tending to careers counselling. This is not to underestimate the true and honourable value of therapy. However. It cannot stop there. It cannot be a continual excuse for not following your creative expression.

Erich Fromm was a German psycho psychologist and philosopher, who wrote a book I read a few years ago called The Art of Loving. In it he mentions something quite memorable in terms of a mothers love consisting of milk and honey, in short offering not only the milk of nourishment in terms of feeding, clothing, housing, etc but also the sweetness of what life has to offer by indulging in that sweetness herself, namely, how to be happy. Here is a short reading of the passage in question.

So it's our responsibility as women, as mothers, to give the right signals to our daughters, to be models they aspire to, to consider our journey as one that feeds them through our own well being. And in turn, the more you practise looking within, the sharper your intuition comes to your kids or to the younger generation as a whole. You may not realise that you could be the model any young women is looking up to.

And I mean that comment for all ages.


Sandra Radja

Established in 2012 The She Oak aims to provide healing through diet and lifestyle counselling as well as educational programs. I believe in teaching others to not only know their inherent constitutions that will best serve them but also how to help themselves should they mis-align with their true nature. Ayurveda treats the individual not the disease.